1. Flush We Can!

    YOU know what’s been in the news a lot lately? Yes, that’s right: flushable wipes!

    They’re “flushable” all right – like a five-pound bag of quick-setting concrete is “flushable!”

    Oh, you’re technically able to flush any of ’em down the toilet, sure–that’s not where your problems start. No sir, that’s where your plumber’s children’s college funds start.

    Those guys have been loving all that extra business they’ve been getting by yanking out your soiled doo-rags once they clog up the waterworks halfway between your terlet, dere, and the septic tank or municipal sewer line.

    However, Consumer Reports did one of those reports [for consumers!] and found that these dealies…

    cottonelle

    …passed with flying colors! (Presumably various shades of brown.)

    Cottonelle FreshCare flushable cleansing cloths actually did break down.

    Eventually.

    But they did break down, my attorney is quite insistent I let you know.

    That’s not what we’ve come here for today. We’re here because of this emblem on their package:

    sewersafe

    Let’s ignore that ominous asterisk on the upper right corner that seems to say “Sewer and Septic Safe…but…”

    At first I thought it was another of those dangling asterisks without a corresponding one elsewhere on the package, but eventually I found its mate and see that it indicates a trademark of Kimberly-Clark, the makers of this fine personal care product.

    Why an * instead of a ™? No idea. Seems to me a standard trademark symbol wouldn’t leave people looking for terms, conditions or exceptions, but what do I know? Regardless, forget all that.

    No, what you need to focus on is the artwork in the middle of the above emblem. It, eh, it seemed sort of familiar to me somehow.

    And then I realized:

    obamawipes

    It’s not identical, of course–the one on the left has a rectangle in the middle and is just blue and white–but there are definite similaries. And I guess it’s good there’s no red in the lines representing water. If that was the case, you’ve probably got more problems than, uh, keeping clean down there and should probably call your doctor before Roto-Rooter.

    Anyway! Complete coincidence or subtle commentary on the current administration? I wouldn’t know; I’m not legally qualified to comment on logo design and this is not a political blog.

    So someone else can make the inevitable CafePress bumper sticker.

    Posted by on January 13, 2014, 2:50 AM.

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